TowThe Halloween Gods
by Jayne Leigh
Summary: Ross doesn't believe in Halloween and everyone else is terrified of being turned into a pumpkin by 'Old Man Nixon' Joint fic by myself and DrKerryWeaver. Please read and review!


**Heya, just a one part fic for Halloween that I've written with DrKerryWeaver. Its just a bit of fun! Set sometime during the first few seasons. Please review and let us know what you think! **

**Tow-The Halloween Gods**

Ross, Rachel, Monica and Phoebe sat in Central Perk discussing their day when Chandler and Joey came in.

"What's up Joe?" Monica questioned, noticing how excited he looked.

"Its Halloween tomorrow!" He grinned. "And we're going to doctorate the apartment and tell scary stories and stuff!"

"Halloween?" Ross let out a small laugh. "That's just for kids."

"Oh really? Then why did you dress up as a dinosaur last year?" Rachel asked.

"A dinosaur?" Joey repeated, laughing. "Dude, you're a dork!"

"Shut up!" He scowled at them.

"Be careful Ross, you don't want to go upset The Halloween Gods…" Chandler warned, sitting down in the armchair.

"Oh, he's right Ross, that would be bad…very bad…" Phoebe nodded.

"They get annoyed with none believers…Especially around Halloween…" Chandler added.

"Halloween Gods, yeah whatever…" Ross rolled his eyes.

"I'm staying away from you!" Joey moved away from Ross.

"Good idea, Joe…" Chandler told him.

"This is funny!" Monica let out a laugh.

"Oh this is not a joke!" Phoebe insisted.

"Yeah, okay whatever guys…" Rachel picked her magazine back up, losing interest in the conversation.

"Fine, believe what you like…" Chandler replied. "But don't come running to me when you get turned into a pumpkin."

"Oh please! People don't turn into pumpkins…It's impossible!" Ross insisted.

"Yeah, that's what Freddie Howard said!" Chandler answered.

"Who's Freddie Howard?" Monica asked, looking at the others uneasy.

"Someone they made up!" Ross cut in.

"Just someone who went to my high school…" He told them, ignoring Ross. "Except he didn't exactly graduate…"

"Why? Did he drop out?" Joey questioned.

"I bet the Halloween gods got him, right Chandler?" Phoebe said.

"Some people said he dropped out…. But…" He started but his voice trailed off. "Nah, you guys won't believe me."

"Oh, no…come on tell us!" Joey insisted.

"Yeah, go on…" Monica agreed and even Rachel put down her magazine to look at him. Ross rolled his eyes at his friends' reactions.

"Okay then…it was our last year and…" He leaned forward before stopping, glancing around the room. "Y'know, what…I'm not getting a good vibe in here…maybe its best if I say the story for tomorrow night…. I don't want to upset the Halloween Gods."

"Okay then…" Monica nodded. "Do we have to dress up for this party?"

"Scary stories, dressing up? What are you guys, 8?" Ross shook his head in disbelief of his friends.

Chandler ignored Ross and looked at Monica. "Well, the Halloween Gods like people celebrating the day dedicated to them."

"Okay, I guess it'll be kind of fun dressing up…" Rachel replied. "What do you think, Mon?"

"Why not? I haven't dressed up since I was 13..." She grinned thinking back. "What a night that was…I stole all Ross' candy!"

"So, if we dress up, you'll tell us what happened to Freddie?" Joey asked.

"Yeah sure…" Chandler shrugged in reply.

"Cool!" Joey grinned. "Hey girls need some costume ideas you could be bikini models or slutty nurses or hey a stripper…"

"Joey you're disgusting!" Rachel groaned.

"I second that!" Monica added.

"So, you seriously want us to dress up?" Ross looked at Chandler. "Just for some stupid made up story!"

"Oh come on, Ross…. it's gonna be fun!" Monica said.

"Yeah, so what if it's all 'made up'…" Rachel put air quotes around the made up. "What have you got to lose?"

"My sanity…" He replied.

"Oh, yeah…like you've got that already…" Phoebe laughed.

"Hey!" He pouted.

"Oh come on, big brother…it'll be fun!" Monica claimed again.

"Alright, fine but I'm only doing this to prove that I'm right!"

"Or that you're wrong!" Phoebe added.

"Okay, well I guess we've gotta figure out what we're wearing now…" Monica stated.

"Ah, you can't tell us!" Joey claimed

"Why not?" Rachel looked at him

"Its bad luck if the guys sees what the girls are wearing!"

There was silence for a moment as everyone stared at him.

"That's before a wedding Joe..." Chandler said, when no one else spoke.

Joey looked at him for a second, thinking about it. "Well, whatever! It'll be fun this way!"

"Alright, fine…we won't tell you…" Monica rolled her eyes.

"Thank you..." He smiled happily and sat back down...after a few minutes he looked at Chandler. "So what are you going to wear?"

Chandler just looked at him before shaking his head and standing up. "Okay, I'm out here...I gotta get some stuff for the party tomorrow..."

"Yeah, I have to go and find custom…" Monica got up as well.

"Me too…" Rachel stood up.

"Oh, I'll come!" Phoebe jumped up excited.

"Okay! This is going to be fun!" Monica claimed.

"Yeah, we get to go shopping!" Rachel squealed.

Once they had all gone, Joey looked at Ross curiously. "So, you really think that Chandler's making all this up?"

"Of course!" Ross exclaimed. "Halloween Gods and people turning into pumpkins just isn't possible!"

"Really?" He queried nervously.

"Just me, Joe…" He said. "Chandler's just trying to scare us."

"Um, yeah well I think I'll just do as he says…. y'know just in case…" He nodded, trying not to sound worried.

"Whatever, Joe…" Ross rolled his eyes.

"Well, I'm gonna go…" He stood up and went to leave. "You're bad luck!"

"If you say so…" Ross replied, more interested in his newspaper.

_**XxXxX**_

The next night, Joey was getting impatient. He wanted the party to start but no one was ready. He was waiting for Monica and Rachel to finish getting ready in their apartment and for Ross, Phoebe and Chandler to turn up.

"Guys, come on!" He whined, jumping up and down slightly, dressed in his Frankenstein custom.

"In a minute!" He heard Rachel snap from her bedroom.

"Looking good Frankie" Phoebe teased with a wink as she walked into the apartment; dressed as a she-devil complete with a little red shirt, read tights, a tail and horns. "Like my costume?"

"Yeah baby!" He grinned.

"Okay, I'm ready…" Monica announced as she came out of her room, she looked towards Rachel's door. "Is she still in there!"

"What are you suppose to be?" Phoebe asked Monica who wore a yellow and blue form fitting gown and

"I'm a sexy snow white " she grinned.

"Well, that's not very scary!" Joey commented, frowning.

"So? Who said they had to be scary?" She asked.

"Fine…but you'll be the ones upsetting the Halloween Gods!" He held his hands up in defence.

"Hey, Chandler never said they had be scary costumes!" She pointed out.

"Fine, whatever…." He replied just as Ross came in dressed as a 'Mommy.'

"Hey! Look at Mr 'Halloween is for Kids'…" Joey teased when he saw him.

"Oh shut up!" Ross replied. "I wasn't going to be the only one not dressed up!"

"Okay, Ross…" Phoebe laughed, obviously not believing him.

"Can we just get out of here, already?" Monica asked. "Rachel, hurry up!"

"I'm coming already!" She shouted back and then a few minutes later she appeared from her room.

"A witch, huh?" Monica started, teasingly seeing her custom. "It suits you…"

"Thanks…" She smiled before slightly. "What's that meant to mean!"

"Nothing…" She replied, quickly. "Come on, let's go!"

"Wait…where's Chandler?" Ross asked.

"I dunno…haven't seen him all day…" Joey shrugged.

"He's probably setting everything up across the hall…" Monica answered. "Lets just go!"

"Alright, fine…" They agreed and followed her over there.

They walked in expecting tacky Halloween decorations but instead the room was dark and gloomily, with only a few candles scattered around, making shadows on the wall... there was also some old weird scary looking ointments of skulls and bones...

"Wow, this is kind of creepy..." Rachel commented as she stepped inside.

"This is way cool! The Gods will be pleased!" Phoebe grinned.

"Uh, I'm with Rachel…this is kind of spooky…" Monica whispered, looking around.

"Is this it!" Ross asked, walking in.

"Shh, don't anger the Gods!" Joey hissed.

"Hey, guys! Sorry, I'm late!" Chandler appeared behind them, still in his work suit; making Rachel, Monica and Joey jump slightly. "Wow, good job, Joe…the apartment looks great!"

Joey's eyes widened. "I didn't do this…I thought you did!"

"If…if Chandler didn't do this…and Joey did…. Then who did?" Rachel looked around the apartment, nervously.

"Okay...whatever chandler...we all know you did it..." Ross stated. "Come on, we're not going to fall for that!"

"Ross, I've been in meetings all day..." Chandler started when suddenly his bedroom door slammed start, startling them all.

Monica and Rachel jumped letting out small screams.

"Oh ha ha who's hiding in your room Gunther?" Ross asked.

"Ross, I'm serious! I haven't done anything!" Chandler insisted.

"Yeah, okay…then how did the door slam?"

"I don't know!" Chandler replied, moving towards his bedroom and trying to pull the door open. He slowly turned back to the others. "It's stuck!"

"Yeah right!" Ross tried the doorknob but it wouldn't open. "Okay Gunther or who ever let the door go!"

Suddenly the door opened, sending both Ross and Chandler stumbling into the room.

"Oh very funny!" Ross said, standing up.

"What's this?" Joey picked up a white shirt and a black cloak that had been torn to piece.

"That was my custom…" Chandler said frowning.

"Why is it torn up?" Rachel asked.

"Looks, like we've upset the Gods…" He raised an eyebrow slightly.

"Oh please you tore it up or whoever is hiding either in your closet or under your bed!" Ross rolled his eyes.

"Alright then, go check!" Chandler told him.

"Fine!" Ross walked over to the closet opening the door Chandler's life-sized cardboard cut-out of Yasmine Bleeth fell out causing him to scream.

"Dude you scream like a girl!" Joey giggled.

"What was that!" Phoebe jumped forward, causing everyone to look at her.

"There's nothing there, Pheebs…" Monica looked behind them.

"No, I felt something!" She insisted.

"Well, I don't see anything…" Monica told them.

"This is nuts! Chandler has everything rigged like I told Joey he's just trying scare us!" Ross insisted.

Chandler rolled his eyes and dropped his ruined costume on his bed and walked out the room. "Believe what you like, Pumpkin Boy…"

"Well, its worked…I'm scared…" Rachel said as they all followed Chandler.

"Me too…" Monica agreed.

"Oh come on...there's nothing to be scared of..." Ross started but two of the ointments of the counter fell to the floor and smashed. "Okay, that kind of impressive..."

"I don't wanna be here any more..." Joey whined.

"Neither do I!" Rachel added.

"I do!" Phoebe exclaimed. "This is so cool!"

"Yeah but you're weird!" Joey told her.

"Oh come on! It's Halloween!" She insisted. "Anyway, we believe in the Halloween Gods! We're not danger!"

They all turned to look at Ross who rolled his eyes in reply.

"You really don't think any of this is scary?" Monica asked.

"Nah…" She shook her. "Anyway, we still haven't heard Chandler's story!"

"Awe man does that mean we're staying here" Joey whined.

"Oh stop it Joey!" Ross said.

"Ross! Did you ever think maybe this is all real? That maybe Chandler isn't doing it?" Monica asked.

"Yeah come on, do you really think chandler's clever enough to do all this?" Phoebe asked

"Thanks, Pheebs..." Chandler cut in.

"Okay, so if it's not Chandler then how do you explain it?" He asked.

"It's the Halloween Gods…" She whispered.

"Oh, yeah whatever…." He laughed, still not believing.

"Stop it Ross, you're making them angrier!" Joey said when another ornament smashed on the floor, making them all jump again.

"Okay, Chandler…tell your story…" He said then looked at the others. "Then you'll see how fake this all is."

"Yeah, tell the story…" Monica nodded moving to sit down the others following.

"This is so cool!" Phoebe exclaimed, excited.

"Are you all ready for this?" Chandler asked.

"Uh, I guess so…" Joey answered, nervously.

"Alright then... It was Halloween night 1985... to us it was just another night, but it gave us an excuse to have a party...it was at midnight when we decided to tell scary stories... a guy called Martin Lewis told everyone the story of 'old man Nixon'... He was an old lonely man and one Halloween he run out of candy to give out... so the kids played a trick on him...they egged his house and smashed his pumpkins... he chased after them but slipped on the mess and broke his neck...apparently, he trials around New York city, looking for some revenge..."

Rachel shifted closer to Joey and phoebe as she listened to him telling the story.

Joey looked wide-eyed. 'Di..did he ever fined revenge?"

"Some say that no matter how many people he terrorises, he never feels any better..." Chandler told him. "Freddie Howard didn't believe it and challenged old man Nixon...after everyone went back to the party, until we noticed Freddie missing... we looked for him but couldn't find him... Until we noticed a trail of pumpkin seeds, we followed them and there on Freddie's bed, in his dorm room was a pumpkin…" He paused. "No one has seen him since."

Ross smirked. "What a bunch of boohocky!"

Chandler ignored him. "Some believe that Old man Nixon, chooses his victims out by picking the ones that don't believe in him after being told the story or choosing a close friend or loved one to punish that person..."

They all looked at Ross as they moved away from him.

"Oh come on you guys!" Ross shook his head.

"They say, he waits until his victim is alone and sneaks up behind them, placing his hand on their shoulder making them slowly turn around, before stabbing them with a kitchen knife and carrying their body away...then later a pumpkin appears..."

As he talked, he slowly and quietly reached his hand up and placed it on Monica's shoulder, who was sat closest to him. Monica was listening to Chandler when she felt something on her shoulder, she jumped and screamed.

Chandler laughed. "Sorry, just me!"

"Jerk!" She cried out, pushing him.

"I was only joking around..." He replied. "Beside Old Man, Nixon doesn't attack until you're all alone!"

"Yeah right old man Nixon!" Ross rolled his eyes

"Well what if it had been him…he would have had your sister and then how would you have felt huh Ross?" Phoebe asked.

"Guys, this is crazy!" Ross exclaimed. "I can't believe you're all believing this!"

"Well, you better start believing Ross I can't be a pumpkin I look terrible in orange!" Rachel stated.

"I'm not going anywhere on my own!" Joey announced and looked at chandler. "Dude, I'm staying with you..."

"You guys are such babies!" Ross said.

"No we're not we just like being people!" Monica pointed out.

"Okay, Ross you keep not believing...I gotta pee..." Chandler stood up and headed into the bathroom.

"No! Chandler don't! You'll be alone old man Nixon might get you!" Joey panicked.

"It'll be okay, Joe…" He told him. "I'll just be in here."

"But Chandler…" He started but was cut off.

"I'll be right back…" Chandler said before closing the door behind him.

"This is so lame!" Ross claimed.

"Ross! Start believing or I'll kick your ass!" Joey threatened.

"Ohh…and are the Halloween gods gonna help ya!" He replied sarcastically.

"So, you do believe!" Phoebe asked, not getting the sarcasm.

"Nooo…" He said slowly and patronisingly. "There is no such thing…"

"Oh, guys..." Rachel started, getting everyone's attention. "We...we still haven't figured out who set all this stuff up...both Joey and Chandler said they didn't do it...and...and Chandler does seem to be taking a long time in the bathroom..."

"Relax Rach he's doing it on purpose to scare us…" Ross insisted. "And Chandler probably did all this, heard us coming and pretended to be coming home from work."

"Well, maybe someone should check on him just in case…" She suggested.

"Fine, I'll do it…" He sighed, standing up and knocking on the bathroom door. "Chandler?"

There was no answer.

"Okay, Chandler stop fooling around now!" He knocked again.

"Why isn't he answering?" Joey questioned. "Open the door!"

"Ugh fine!" Ross put his hand on the knob and slowly opened the door.

They all stood behind him, waiting for chandler to shout at them to get out but they found the bathroom empty.

"Okay very funny Chandler!" Ross walked in pulling the shower curtain open thinking he was hiding in the tub. As he did, Rachel screamed when she spotted a bloody knife on the floor.

Monica looked over at Rachel and gasped when she saw it to. "Oh my god!"

"What? No...this can't... how did he...?" Ross stuttered, looking around confused, still reluctant to believe the story.

"It was him! It was Old Man Nixon! He took Chandler!" Joey said clearly scared.

"I'm getting out of here!" Rachel exclaimed, running out of the bathroom, with the others following. Rachel tried to pull open the front door. "Oh my god the doors locked!"

"Oh god we're trapped he's gonna turn us all in to pumpkins!" Monica cried

"See what you did you non-believer!" Phoebe glared at Ross.

"What about chandler!" Joey whined. "He's dead, isn't he!"

Monica glanced back at the bedroom. "I don't know, Joe…"

Ross flicked on the lights. "I wanna know how he got out the bathroom..."

"It was old man Nixon!" Phoebe claimed.

"I still don't think..." He started but stopped as they all stared at the floor in shock.

"Is this proof enough!" She pointed at a trail of pumpkin seeds going to chandler's room.

"No way..." He muttered, following them... Turning on the bedroom lights…stopping dead when he saw a pumpkin on the bed.

"He's a pumpkin!" Joey shrieked.

Monica stared at the pumpkin on Chandler's bed tears in her eyes 'We..we're next aren't we?" she whispered.

"How...what…?" Ross stuttered, all his beliefs disappearing…Suddenly all the lights in the apartment turned off causing them all to scream.

"I wanna go home!" Rachel whimpered.

"No Rach we…we need to stay together he can get us if we're alone!" Joey said.

"But...but what if he's here with us?" She questioned.

"We have to do something…" Monica insisted. "We can't just sit here and wait for him to get us!"

"Maybe we'll be okay now…" Ross said. "Now…now that I believe!"

"Yeah but what about Chandler?" She asked. "It's to late for him!"

They jumped when they heard the door to chandler closet opening, turning quickly towards it...they all screamed when they saw an old man, with torn clothes, a deathly pale face and smelled of rotten eggs heading towards them.

"Let me out of here!" Joey screamed running for the front door.

The guys followed them as they all ran from the room.

"Revenge is as sweet as pumpkin pie..." He chanted, pulling out a knife, coming after them.

"We're gonna die!" Rachel cried.

"I'll teach you kids for not believing..." The guys said, moving towards them all.

"We do believe...we do. We do ...we do..." Ross cried, trying to pull open the door.

"To little ...to late..." He answered, getting closer and closer.

They were all huddled against the door trying to open it…all of them terrified.

He stopped in front of them. "Any last words?"

"Please don't kill us!" Rachel begged.

"Yo.you already took my best friend is.isn't that enough?" Monica cried "

I believe, I believe" Ross kept chanting to himself.

"You believe?" Old Man Nixon looked at him.

"Yes…yes I do…" He nodded nervously.

"Do the dance!" He ordered

"What dance?" Ross questioned.

"The Halloween gods' dance!" He replied. "Do it now or die!"

"I don't...I don't know how..." He stuttered.

"Oh, I do... I looked it up on the internet..." Phoebe cut in, turning to Old Man Nixon. "Hi Phoebe Buffay, Big Halloween Fan..."

Old Man Nixon growled at her.

"Wow, jeez, someone got up on the wrong side of the graveyard..." She muttered.

"Don't anger him Pheebs! Just teach us the dance! "Joey whipered.

"Alright, fine...first you gotta jump up and down 5 times...then you spin around twice... and bend down and touch your toes... then you do the moonwalk..." She demonstrated every dance more. "Oh, you also gotta sing 'Halloween Gods, Halloween Gods...show us mercy...for we are only humans and can't beat your mighty powers..."

They all watched Phoebe dancing and sing around before copying her moves whilst Old Man Nixon watched them.

"I feel so stupid" Rachel whispered to Joey as she danced.

"Shh I wanna live!"

"Stop!" Old Man Nixon commanded and they did straight away.

"You!" He pointed his knife at Ross. "Step forward!"

Ross swallowed nervously looking back at the others as he slowly stepped forward.

"You don't believe in me..." He whispered.

"I uh, I uh." he stuttered, "I didn't but I do now…"

"I don't believe you..." He replied.

"I..I Swear…I do!"

"Your friend is gone!"

"I…I know…" Ross looked down at the floor.

"And now it's your turn!" He brought the knife high above his head.

Please" Ross pleaded. "I..I Have a son he…. He needs me.."

Monica, Rachel, Joey and Phoebe watched scared.

Just then they heard a key turning in the door, which then opened and the lights flicked on

"Hey guys..." Chandler threw his keys on the foosball table.

"Do you mind..." Old man Nixon looked at him. "I'm in the middle of something here..."

"Oh sorry...Carry on.." Chandler turned to light off and left again. They all continued to scream before they realised

"Hold on..." Ross walked over and opened the door and find chandler stood there grinning.

"Happy Halloween!"

They all looked at Chandler and then at Old Man Nixon "Bu..but how, wh…who…" Monica stuttered.

'Dude! You're not a pumpkin!" Joey exclaimed.

"Man, we got you guys good!" Phoebe laughed, being told the plan the day before in the coffee house.

"I told you it wasn't true!" Ross claimed.

"Oh please Ross you were so begging for your life! You believed!" Phoebe pointed out.

"Halloween Gods, Halloween Gods...show us mercy...for we are only humans and can't beat your mighty powers..." Chandler sang in a mocking voice.

"Shut up!" Ross scrowled.

"So, you set all this up!" Rachel questioned.

Chandler shrugged. "Yeah…"

"You jerk!" Monica said once more and pushed him again. "I scared the hell out of us!"

"I know!" He grinned.

"But how did you do it all?" Joey asked, confused.

"Well, Ross was right about a lot of the stuff…" He shrugged. "I set all this up when waited down stairs until you guys came over…."

"Told ya!" Ross cut in.

"My friend, Jason was waiting in my room and slammed the door…" He suggested to 'old man Nixon' who had rubbed off the make up he was wearing and took off the gray wig. "And he was hiding under the bed… we were just lucky Ross looked in the closet first…then Phoebe distracted you all by saying she felt something behind her and Ross forgot to look under the bed…"

"Hehe…I got you guys…" Phoebe laughed.

"Then I put the pumpkin on the bed and waitined in the closet…" Jason added.

"How did you get the orinments to fall?" Rachel asked.

"I tied from thread around them and pulled them when we came out of my room…" He shrugged.

"Alright, how did you get out of bathroom?" Moncia questioned.

"Oh come on…" He laughed. "I climbed out the window! I'm surprised Ross, didn't work that out! Then climbed down the fire escape and came back up to lock the door from outside."

"And the pumpkin seeds?"

"I put them down when you were all knocking on the bathroom door…" Phoebe told them.

"Aw, man…I can't believe we got tricked!" Joey whined.

"Well believe it, baby!" Chandler grinned.

"Okay, now we've got that sorted out, I'm going to bed…" Rachel stated, heading for the door. "Fighting for your life is tiring…."

"Sleep with one eye open!" Monica pointed at him following her out.

"Right, I'm out of here…" Jason told Chandler. "I'll see you at work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, okay…thanks man…" Chandler replied.

"No problem…" He said leaving.

"I'm going to go home too…" Phoebe added.

"I'll walk you…" Joey offered. "You don't wanna get attacked by 'Old Man Nixon' again…"

"Joe, 'Old Man Nixon' is made up…" Chandler rolled his eyes.

"Nu-uh…I'm not falling for that!" He claimed.

Chandler shook his head, watching as he and Phoebe left.

"I knew it was all fake…" Ross said once they were alone.

"Oh come on, admit it…you were scared…" Chandler looked at him in disbeleif.

"Alright, fine….I was…but just for a little while…"

"Yeah okay, Ross…"

"People turning into Pumpkins…" Ross let out a laugh. "How stupid is that…"

Just then the apartment went pitch black again.

"Chandler, give up…you're not going to trick me again!" Ross told him.

"It…wasn't…me…" Chandler slowly.

"What?"

"It wasn't me, this time…" He repeated. "I swear on my life…"

"Then who…" Ross started but a voice come from behind them cut him off.

"_Revenge is as sweet as pumpkin pie…" _

Chandler and Ross slowly turned to look at each other…their eyes wide with fear.

"Lets get out of here!" Chandler exclaimed running for the door with Ross right behind him.

The door to Joey's room opened and Gunther stepped out.

"That's what you get for scaring my Rachel…" He said having heard Chandler and Phoebe talking about the plan in the coffee house.

**The End! **

**Hope you liked it! Please review! **


End file.
